Get ready to rock and roll for some Awesome Packer/Steeler Action and host the party that will be talked about non-stop as soon as the hangovers clear up!

Follow these easy steps to weasel your way up the social ladder, impress your co-workers, find a new and better spouse, reach your life goals, and establish yourself as your neighborhood’s Silverback!

1. GET BIT BY A SPIDER

What doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger. By the time your fever-insanity wears off, you’ll be ready to do a touch down dance! And with any luck, the spider will be irradiated–giving you more power (awesome!) and responsibility (boo!).

2. PROVIDE FOOD
Fill up on some wine and bread before you crack out your expensive ceremonial peyote!

3. GIVE LOTS AND LOTS OF HUGS

Football games get people’s dander up. It riles the blood and spoils the spleen! Football is dangerous, violent, and exactly what the Donner Party would look like if it was interrupted by advertisements every two minutes.
That’s why the best Super Bowl Parties start with lots of hugs and end with passing around a bowl filled with car keys. Love is the antidote to testosterone. Remember to hug firmly (but not squeezing) and don’t do that “pat pat” thing–it feels condescending.

4. GIVE YOUR GUESTS TATTOOS


After the BBQ accident, you’ll want as many distinguishing marks as possible to identify the bodies.

IN CONCLUSION:
Your party will be known as “the day everything changed” and it will have a movie made of it where your complaining neighbor will be played by Matthew Modine and a number of creative liberties will be taken to make your lifestyle fit a PG-13 rating.

Good luck (and remember a little cilantro goes a long way)!

Ryan McGivern

http://sbtwitter.nfl.com/

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